Can you have Leftovers the first go around?

There are some dinners I make that I prefer the next day or as “leftovers.”  Lagsana is one of them.  Stew is another.  Some dishes I remake the next day with different options and I think to myself “Wow that tastes really good?  Now do I have to make the first dish someday again just to get the leftovers that are the ingredients for the new recipe?  My mind is always backwards . . I guess my palate and cooking methods are

I’ve contemplated backwards thinking now when it comes to my grief.   Not long ago as you all know I had to put my life long man’s best friend down.   On the day that I was to take him to the vet I decided to give him extra hugs, treats, and I took him to a nearby park to enjoy the breeze under the trees one last time.   At the time I thought to myself that perhaps I shouldn’t visit this particular park that I drive by almost daily because it would then be a reminder of Scooter and his last day.   I pushed those warning thoughts aside because I remained focus on the dealing with the difficult task that day of ending Scooter’s increasing suffering.

rainSure enough,  I should have listened.   I do have to drive by that place on a regular basis and it still leaves a knot in my stomach and my eyes burst oceans of tears still after a month or more time has passed.   This experience has brought me to a new post in my blog about dealing with grief and that is . . . “Doing what you can to make grief easier.”

On that day, I wanted to make things good for Scooter.    I could have easily taken him to a park off the main roads and he would have incoherently enjoyed it as much as the other one.   When my Dad died while I was 4 months pregnant, my cropped-wheresgrandpabookcoverpreview.jpgsiblings did what they could to cushion the shock – soften the sadness.   I tried to shield my little girl as well when my mother died.  We do it for others to help them and I think we should do it for ourselves.

The tiniest detail that will haunt and torture might be the one thing you might need to do without during your time of grief.   If you went to a certain restaurant the last time you were with your loved one who has recently passed then don’t go there again until your heart and soul has had time to grieve, recover, and bloom flowers emotionally again.   Protect your fragile heart while you can and if God gives you little hints to prepare you before a devastating loss; listen.

Your heavenly Father knows before we do what will happen, how it will affect you, and what you can or cannot still do about it.   That inner voice/gut feeling/Jiminy Cricket is him speaking to you with love, understanding, and his parental protection.   Let your faith and spirit guide you through the fields of sadness by showing you a path of survival and hope.



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