Well, it has taken me a few days to be even able to type these words for this post . . .This past Monday, Jake and I took our precious dog Scooter to the vet to be put to sleep. It was hard and it was only because God enabled me that we did that which seemed to torment us over months and almost years. Scooter had many many medical setbacks and our suspicions were confirmed by our vet.

That morning I took him with me to take Taylor to school like I used to more than a year ago before he had gotten worse. . . then I took him to a nice woodsy part of the nearby park. I let him run “loose” even though he couldn’t really run anymore and the nice breeze and peacefullness reassured me that this would be his last day. If we had waited any longer he would have been even less mobile and less coherent. I held in my arms while Jake stroked his back as the vet administered his calming shot. It was extremely sad for all us. He was a part of my life alone for 15 and half years. He was by my side through the illnesses, loss of my parents, childbirth, marriage, celebrations, and strife. Always by my side and we all loved him dearly. We miss him so much but deep inside we know that we would know matter when he parted.

Thank you to everyone who has had all of us in the prayers. Thank you for those who did voice their sympathies. You really find out those who value you and those who value pets when these things happen. May God bless all of you with pets or those who have already had to go through similar circumstances. . . .

Scooter 12/1999 – 5/2015june2014 039dad date daughter night 003last scooter


Today, Tomorrow, but not Yesterday

My husband is a handsome guru of sorts, but I can never tell him that because then when we argue he’ll remind me and I’ll have to give up the battle.  Being married for awhile now and will be until I die,  I really don’t want to be on the lower level of power when it comes to a couple’s argument.  I can’t lay out all the cards on the table if you know what I mean 🙂 I struggle with a lot of things but one of my biggest demons is my past.  I still grieve for my Mother and Father, even though they have now been gone for years.     One of the principal reasons I do, I believe and my husband pointed out. . . I still can’t let go of the past.     I have these messes in my past from my childhood when poor mentality and unhealthy habits haunt me. I almost stay paralyzed in my grief.  It is hard to let go of passed loved ones, but even harder to let go of the “holes.” my husband said to me the other night . . L. Why do you always think so much about your past, especially the bad parts.  Let it go. . . focus on right now, today and even think about a bright tomorrow, but don’t stay in a unhealthy rut by thinking of yesterday. He’s right.  (Don’t tell him)  I had a hornet’s nest of regret, grief, despair, dysfunction, swarming around my heart smothering out the good stuff of today and the great stuff to come tomorrow.  My mom and Dad wouldn’t want that.  God doesn’t want that.  There is only one entity who wants you to stay down, and sad, and overly mournful and he doesn’t deserve any part of your day or future. If you are still grieving I certainly understand and pray for you.  If you are finding it hard to get over things from the past with that love one who has passed on think about what we talked about here today . . . Tomorrow, but not yesterday and move bravely on.

Well I‘m a tad bit excited.  Please check out my latest children’s book available now at

or you may contact me by email at

I will also be signing books if you would like a signed copy let me know . . . 

If you know me by my pen name or my personal name please specify within the book email request.

Thanks everyone!


Letters to Heaven

I thought I’d like to try something new.  I wanted to see if any of you out there wish you could still communicate with lost loved ones.  No I‘m not a medium!  I was just thinking myself how I would like to write down in letter form things I wish I could say to my mom or my dad that I can’t.   For me sometimes writing something down is a way for getting things out of me that have been trapped hanging around in my head occupying valuable space of my brain and memory.  This was originally discovered when I started writing to do lists and grocery lists.  I found that I became a teensy bit sharper at other things I would need to do if I got those things off my mind by putting out on paper or like in this case on the computer.

Most of the time the things I miss mostly about not having my parents around is sharing ordinary events with them:  first day of school, awards ceremonies, recitals, a new funny word one of the kids made up, a new flower that is growing in my yard that I haven’t killed yet, and so on and so on.

So I invite all of you if you would like to log away any letters to those people who decided to run up to heaven and get a good seat before you . . . send them a letter, give them a “shout out”, scribble a sentence, whatever you feel like you want to say (write) you go right ahead.  And may God bless and keep you all in peace and comfort as only our Heavenly Father can do. [contact-form][contact-field label="Name" type="name" id="e8d07490-9165-45c3-84c0-9042932dbf03" class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark">/][contact-field label="Email" type="email" id="c31949eb-e232-4d0b-bdf9-0c3258e530d5" class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark">/][contact-field label="To Whom?" id="662d83c7-eb70-45ea-b0e9-cfd511920735" class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark">/][contact-field label="Would you like this post published <span id="f9936cf1-bcf5-4c81-9999-e4fd539c2f88" class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark">on line</span>?" id="c12ed54d-b885-40df-8e84-674a40ae77c1" class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark">/][contact-field label="Your letter would say. . . ." type="textarea" id="3b468820-0fa4-472c-8900-40cb42d86823" class="GINGER_SOFTWARE_mark">/][/contact-form]

Some of the smallest gestures make the biggest difference when you are grieving. . .

guilty puppyListen to the clip from Yahoo TV where Liam Neeson tells Watch What Happens Live! host, Andy Cohen what Liam what was edited from the 60 minutes piece.   I’m not particularly surprised frankly about any editing that 60 Minutes does.   I’m sure that they felt that the omission was not a big deal and if so than possibly they are not as familiar with grieving personally or perhaps they just had too many other things to fit into a short time limit.

In any case I thought it interesting and I have found that not only in my own life have I seen this type of thing hurt but I have had seen countless other people hurt by the same scenario.  If you know someone who has lost a loved one . . . do the right thing:be thoughtful, send a card, bake a lasagna, do something to acknowledge their loss.



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What do you think is overlooked when it comes to dealing with Grief?

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